Friday, March 2, 2007

CM PRESS # 95

THE BRAIN BUG LIVING BELOW CITY HALL

The black helicopter conspiracy whackjobs are out in full force in Costa Mesa these days, and they're coming up with all kinds of silliness to explain various elected officials' positions on things.

This is not a group that's ever been shaved by Occam's Razor, dear friends. They see dark conspiracies in everything and this tells a little about the poor state of their twisted brains.

Most of the whackjob conspiracy theorists in Costa Mesa are lefties instead of the expected righties. Most probably have inadequate personalities, to put it mildly.

These crackpots are just engaging in the age old hate that in some places and at some times saw crackpots blaming Jews for everything that was going on. Today, however, these crackpots have different, more PC targets. Their psychology hasn't changed, but their targets have. Bigots are bigots are bigots.

It seems that Mayor Mansoor can't so much as buy a hamburger without some of these whackjobs thinking that he was put up to it by someone or other.

Hey, whackjobs, could it possibly be that Mansoor is actually a pretty bright guy and decides things on his own and doesn't need others to tell him what to do or how to think? I mean, is that possible?

Now, we really don't know Mr. Mansoor very well, so maybe there is someone directing his every move, but we doubt it. But, wait a minute...hmmm..."Mansoor" sounds like "Man Sewer" and thus "Man in the sewer" and the sewer is down below City Hall and....

Hold on...Hmmm. Our eyes begin to squint and our voice lowers to a whisper. Could there be a brain bug, as seen in the movie Starship Troopers, living down below city hall,who is using his highly evolved brain to direct the actions of Mansoor and some others in the city? Prove there isn't one you skeptics. And, yes, we know that your denial that there's a brain bug just proves that you're part of the conspiracy and you're also probably being guided by the brain bug. You can't fool us.

Even now, the brain bug is probably sending out brain waves to help Mansoor tie his shoes and find his way to his car. And, remember, Mansoor spelled backwards is Roosnam. Also, don't forget that the first letter of Mansoor is also the thirteenth letter of the alphabet! Explain that, Mr. Mansoor!

Pretty silly, right? Well it's no sillier than some of the things that some of these crackpots are saying these days.

No doubt this propeller beanie crew has the following tune dancing in their tiny heads:

They're coming to take me away, HA HA
They're coming to take me away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the happy home
With trees and flowers and chirping birds
And basket weavers who sit and smile
And twiddle their thumbs and toes
And they're coming to take me away, Ha-haaa!
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Those are our opinions. Thanks for reading them.

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