HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY ZORRO
by M. H. Millard (c) 2008
Maybe I'm kind of dumb, but I don't get it.
The former president of Mexico was named Vicente Fox. Now, isn't "Fox" the English translation of "Zorro"? So why wasn't he called President Zorro?
And, if you visit Ireland, you'll find a lot of people named Fox around Dublin and Tipperary, but if you go to Mexico you won't find too many with that name there.
Never mind. I have weightier things to straighten out concerning Mexico and Zorro.
You've probably seen the Zorro movies or TV show where Zorro was a Spanish nobleman who ran around the place carving a "Z" on the bad guys' shirts. Nice story. But you might find the real story even more interesting.
The real Zorro was an Irish soldier of fortune named William Lamport, who was born in 1615 on the Emerald Isle.
Lamport left Ireland and found remunerative work for a time as a privateer--that means he was a pirate with a license from one government that allowed him to attack another nation's ships. In this case, Lamport attacked English merchantmen. It's that Irish/English thing.
In 1643, Lamport enlisted in one of the three Irish regiments in Spanish service (The O’Neill, O’Donnell and Fitzgerald Regiments) to fight against the French forces in Spanish Flanders. He was eventually commended for bravery and entered Spanish Royal service.
Along the way, Lamport--an ever adaptable sort--Latinized his name to "Guillen Lombardo" and ended up in the Spanish colony of Mexico.
Once in Mexico, William/Guillen lived among the poor Indians and studied their religion. For this, he came to the notice of the Spanish Inquisition, which was helping the King of Spain in his attempt to destroy Mexico as it was, and remake it into something of a new world version of Catholic Spain.
William/Guillen soon became the leader of a rebel Mexican independence movement and fought against the Spaniards.
When not fighting the Spaniards, and trying to free Mexico from Spanish rule, William/Guillen was busy having romantic trysts with Spanish noblewomen.
After a time, he became engaged to Antonia Turcious, a member of the nobility. However, before he could marry her, he was arrested by the Inquisition and accused of conspiracy against Spain.
He was sentenced to 10 years in prison, but, and it gets a bit foggy here, he was eventually back on the streets where he then began a harassment campaign against the Spanish by sneaking around at night and painting the walls of Mexico City with his name and anti-Spanish graffiti.
Not exactly the stuff of a "Z" made with a sword, but close enough to be reworked for the Zorro story.
William/Guillen was arrested again in 1652 when found in a compromising situation with the wife of the Spanish Viceroy of Mexico, Marquis Lope Diez de Caderyta.
He was sentenced to 7 years imprisonment and was then turned over to the Inquisition to be burnt at the stake as a heretic (it was because of that native Indian religion that he had been toying with, not the many women).
In 1659 he was tied to the stake in Mexico City, but before the flames reached him, he undid his ropes and strangled himself.
When Cinco de Mayo rolls around next year, be sure to raise a glass of Guinness Stout cervaza to that fine Latino gentleman from Eire–Zorro.
And, on St. Patrick’s Day when you’re at some suitable establishment with an Irish flair--say Skosh Monahans, just to name one local possibility--be sure to raise a glass of Corona beer--from Mexico--in memory of Zorro.
Now, about that name "Skosh;" that’s not Gaelic or even Spanish, amigos. It’s Japanese. So what’s a...never mind.
Oh, okay. When you're drinking your glass of Sake at an Irish bar, with a Japanese word in its name, in honor of St. Patricks day, give a thought to that Irish gentleman, Zorro.
Somehow in a strange universe--such as the one we live in-- this all makes sense.
As Zorro himself might have said: "Beannachtam na Feile Padraig," or, in English, Happy St. Patrick's Day.
-30-
